Review: VARDY V ROONEY: THE WAGATHA CHRISTIE TRIAL at Ambassadors Theatre

And so we find ourselves in a courtroom where a libel action is being heard following a much publicised online spat between footballers’ wives (Coleen Rooney and Rebekah Vardy) two well-known examples of this notoriously attention-seeking species. Such is the level of triviality and vacuousness to which our society has sunk, that it is easy to imagine millions of Twitter users regularly clutching at Botoxed necklines and drawing theatrical gasps (through cosmetically enhanced lips) at the latest tittle-tattling episode or squabbled idiocy exchanged between such meaningless modern-day mentors and motivators (with whom they often, delusionally, believe they’ve a personal bond). The question is, given the illustrious history of courtrooms serving as effective backdrops for dramatic entertainment, does this edited transcript make for a fun and enjoyable evening at the theatre? For this reviewer, the answer is a resounding yes - if only because the writers have kept their tongues firmly embedded in their cheeks whilst proclaiming loudly from the outset that you can’t make this stuff up!

Of the protagonists, Lucy May Barker as Rebekah Vardy gets by far the meatiest opportunities to shine as the affronted but none-too-bright claimant during the first half. Meanwhile Laura Dos Santos subtly layers the slightly nervy and unhinged-by-years-of-unwanted-attention Coleen Rooney so that by the end of the second half there is little doubt why she was exonerated as the victim in the case. Jonnie Broadbent and Tom Turner keep the courtroom theatrics embedded in bewigged realness whilst Halema Hussain and Vernas Vyas serve as football-stylee TV pundit and Judge, respectively. Perhaps the real find of the piece is Nathan McMullen who clutching his pitch-side microphone acts as the perfect foil to the first pundit commentator, whilst also delivering back-of-the-net physical and vocal renderings of both Wayne Rooney and Jamie Vardy during proceedings.

Whilst the real life antics of those who form the subject of the show, would barely impinge on the consciousness of this reviewer, it should be acknowledged that the show itself highlights the very real dangers of casting such individuals as modern day heroes. Their fallibility and foolishness should be a lesson to us all. But park that thought for a moment and simply enjoy the hilariously entertaining, nonsensical spectacle which the show offers, whilst secretly aspiring to something considerably better and more meaningful in your own life. You owe it to yourself - in both instances!

Vardy v Rooney: The Wagatha Christie Trial Tickets